Welcome to my blog. I cannot say it will always be positive nor will it always be happy but it is life. God does not give us an guarantees in life except that He will love us, provide for us and take care of us. My life has taken turns I would never have anticipated but through God's grace and love I continue on my journey, one step at a time.

Monday, October 19, 2009

Why is it so hard?

I had a rough counseling session today. The first session I had a few tears but this session they were more like a flood. I know I need to take care of myself but it is so hard to get there. I asked my counselor why it is so hard. He said it is because of the things that have been ingrained in my head for 33 years. I told him I think I am just plain lazy. He said I don't think you are lazy you are just afraid; afraid of what I could lose and afraid of being successful but at the same time afraid of failing. At that I started laughing. Of course I had to agree with him. I know one day this will all fall into place as long as I keep working and focus on the goal. It is so hard to be patient!