One More Class

We have one more class to attend! The last 9 weeks have flown! I cannot believe it is almost over!

My Purchases

I started purchasing items we may need for foster care. I went to some rummage sales to get clothes and anything else I could find. I chose rummage sales because I wanted to get clothes for boys and girls from infant to 6 years old. I found some really adorable clothes all look new. I could not believe the prices! They were great!

I also found everything to set up a nursery. Now all we need is the crib. It is a Noah's Ark theme. I got all the bedding, decorations, a stool, diaper holder, etc. for only $50. I was excited about that since I really wanted to so that theme and it matches the color the room is already.

I think it is very difficult to plan for an age range. When someone is pregnant they know they are getting an infant but we have no idea what we are getting except that it will be in our age range.

At times, my excitement wanes. However, at other times I am excited. I wish my emotions were more consistent.

Mother's Day

Oh that dreaded day has come and is almost gone for another year. I feel like a mother but I am sure others do not look at me that way. I have a baby. It doesn't matter that my baby died way too early for me to even catch a glimpse of or that my baby is in heaven. I am still a mommy. Of course, there are also the furbabies...they are my kids and I love and adore them!

I have to say it was a nice day. I really enjoyed myself with my Mom. Mom won a petunia at our church because she drove the furthest to attend, 1 1/2 hours. That was quite cool! The sermon was nice. It is just a rough day. I wish it wasn't and I am sure someday it won't be but for now, it is! I long for the day I have a child to celebrate Mother's Day with.

The sermon today was about Hannah. The verses were from I Samuel 1:1-20. Hannah was barren. Eventually God gave her children. Here are a few of the verses.

10 In bitterness of soul Hannah wept much and prayed to the LORD. 11 And she made a vow, saying, "O LORD Almighty, if you will only look upon your servant's misery and remember me, and not forget your servant but give her a son, then I will give him to the LORD for all the days of his life, and no razor will ever be used on his head."

Obviously, Hannah prayed for a child and she received one. I have, off and on, prayed for a baby but have not done it consistently. I feel like God knows what I want and I don't want to be selfish. Maybe I am wrong in this. Maybe I need to pray for a child.

Updated 45 minutes later...How a few minutes can change someone's feelings. I feel very, very sad right now. I guess that is due to a conversation earlier today that is finally sinking in. I know this feeling will pass I just wish it would pass now instead of later and forever!