Mother's Day

Oh that dreaded day has come and is almost gone for another year. I feel like a mother but I am sure others do not look at me that way. I have a baby. It doesn't matter that my baby died way too early for me to even catch a glimpse of or that my baby is in heaven. I am still a mommy. Of course, there are also the furbabies...they are my kids and I love and adore them!

I have to say it was a nice day. I really enjoyed myself with my Mom. Mom won a petunia at our church because she drove the furthest to attend, 1 1/2 hours. That was quite cool! The sermon was nice. It is just a rough day. I wish it wasn't and I am sure someday it won't be but for now, it is! I long for the day I have a child to celebrate Mother's Day with.

The sermon today was about Hannah. The verses were from I Samuel 1:1-20. Hannah was barren. Eventually God gave her children. Here are a few of the verses.

10 In bitterness of soul Hannah wept much and prayed to the LORD. 11 And she made a vow, saying, "O LORD Almighty, if you will only look upon your servant's misery and remember me, and not forget your servant but give her a son, then I will give him to the LORD for all the days of his life, and no razor will ever be used on his head."

Obviously, Hannah prayed for a child and she received one. I have, off and on, prayed for a baby but have not done it consistently. I feel like God knows what I want and I don't want to be selfish. Maybe I am wrong in this. Maybe I need to pray for a child.

Updated 45 minutes later...How a few minutes can change someone's feelings. I feel very, very sad right now. I guess that is due to a conversation earlier today that is finally sinking in. I know this feeling will pass I just wish it would pass now instead of later and forever!